Protocol Snow

I was slow to jump on the Steam bandwagon, but I’m beginning to be a believer. Audiosurf, the first SteamWorks game, was just released on the PC a few days ago and it has done nothing but impress.

Audiosurf is a rhythm/puzzle hybrid that features the music on your own hard drive. The game analyzes the song and spits out a racing track for you to play that dips and bumps in time with the music. It’s very reminiscent of Rez in that respect, and the pace of your “vehicle” on the track matches perfectly with the tempo of the song. Slow, melodic moments will have you cruising uphill, then the beat kicks in and all of a sudden you’re plunging down the mountain at breakneck speeds as lights pop in the background.

I’m surprised how songs of all genres seem to work well with this game. You might think techno tracks would be best, but I’ve tried Mozart, J-pop, and jazz and they all fit in well (though experimentation with individual tracks is required).

I’ve mentioned that this is a rhythm/puzzle game, but there’s actually several modes within Audiosurf. The puzzle modes have you collecting different color bricks on the track and matching like colors, which is decent. But my preferred mode has nothing to do with puzzles and more with pure ninja reflex. The track will be littered with either gray bricks or color bricks, and your task is to weave around the gray and collect the colors.

Nothing I type can capture the game so download the demo and give it a shot. You can only try 4 of your songs before the demo locks up, but it’ll give you a good idea of what to expect. Alternatively, check out this video. If watching this doesn’t get you interested in the game, then it’s not for you. And as the video shows, yes the game works with any mp3 you want.

That’s the only explanation for why I continue to watch awful shows like The Apprentice. I’ve stuck with The Apprentice and indeed haven’t missed a single episode in the entire series. You can tell a show is tanking when they have to pull the celebrity card, but this season’s Apprentice featuring a whole bunch of B level celebrities had some admittedly entertaining moments. The show had a flash of brilliance when Vincent Pastore (from The Sporanos) was fired — the ending to that episode was a parody of the very controversial Sopranos series finale, complete with “Don’t Stop Believing” playing in the background.

But for the most part, the season has been a complete waste. Most of the challenges boil down to the celebrities calling their buddies and asking for big donations. As my brother pointed out, it’s awkward to see these already successful people taking orders from Trump and playing his little games. After Gene Simmons won a challenge and some money for his charity, in the next project he basically committed suicide and forced Trump to fire him so that he can get off the show and go back to his normal life.

I wish I could do the same (go back to my normal life without the show, that is). But since I always finish what I start, I’ll see this season through. I’m finished with The Apprentice after that though, I swear.

The newest patch/update to Team Fortress 2 comes out today with a remake of Badlands, a popular Team Fortress Classic map. How sweet, what a lovely Valentine’s present. I have only eyes for you, Valve!

On the subject of TF2 and love, check out this machinima about the tender relationship between a Heavy and a Medic. Skip to the 3:40 mark unless you want to listen to a review about Sim City Societies (Zero Punctuation reviews were funny at first, but their shtick is getting old).

Lastly, soak in the hotness of this photo as Danny Choo once again ventures out into Tokyo and troops it up, this time accompanied by a couple idols. He is an inspiration to otakus everywhere. Happy Valentine’s Day!

I’m in the Host Defense blocks of med school right now, which involves covering different bacteria, viruses, and fungi that can invade the body and cause all sorts of disease. It reminds me a lot of Pokemon actually. Every time I learn about a new bug, I add it proudly to my collection and marvel at their attack powers I can use to fight other trainers. I am building up a fearsome arsenal to fight Gym Leaders and collect all the gym badges. My ultimate goal is to conquer the champion… er, test.

Ok, lame. But anything seems amusing after studying all these dumb bugs.

Rez in its full 1080p, 5.1 surround sound glory hit Xbox Live Arcade today. A measly $10 gets you one of the best sensory experiences you’ll ever have without resorting to recreational drugs. Combining the two may lead to the opening of an illusory phantom zone where colorful wireframes taste like candy and the blood in your arteries dance to the beat. Rez is one of my favorite games of all time and embodies the spirit of the Sega Dreamcast, which in its brief lifespan was lucky to showcase the creativity of the industry’s best at their best.

I never explained how I arrived at my new moniker “Protocol Snow”. For years, I was known online as “Snow Wolf”, a handle inspired by a historical fiction novel of the same title about a plot to assassinate Joseph Stalin during the Cold War.  I first started using it around 1998 when I was a hardcore Team Fortress Classic player. Around last year, I started thinking of a new name since “Snow Wolf” is surprisingly common and I wanted something more original. It just so happened that I was blasting the soundtrack to Rez at the time, and the song playing was the Area 2 track. Its title: Protocol Rain.

Congrats to Mirai Nagasu on winning the 2008 U.S. Figure Skating Championships! At 14, she’s the 2nd youngest ever girl to win it. Normally I don’t pay much attention to figure skating, but hey, she’s from my hometown and goes to my high school. There was nothing else on TV so I caught the tail-end of the competition and saw her win.

It’s so impressive to see these prodigy kids competing on a stage like this. I’m only 22 but I feel old.

These two gifs say it all.

Crush with the fatality.

Wolf with the flying tackle.